Broomstick Polish
by EL7
Summary: Just a short thingy about Draco Malfoy being embarrassed by the new DADA teacher. Stupid, but funny and worth a look!


Broomstick polish  
  
Hey Buddies!  
  
Please try to imagine Tom Felton as Draco Malfoy when you read this. He's got to be so cute when he's embarrassed!  
  
Um, please do not expect too much.  
  
Enjoy!  
  
Disclaimer: All characters you recognise belong to the great J. K. Rowling.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
The bell rang and without wasting any time the pupils left their classrooms and made their way to the Great Hall for lunch.  
  
Draco Malfoy was walking with a group of Slytherins. They just had Defense Against the Dark Arts with the new teacher: Professor Barnes. She was a female version of Gilderoy Lockhart. At least in Draco's opinion.  
  
He had succeeded in embarrassing Professor Barnes in front of all the Slytherin sixth years by asking her about a dangerous fruit that didn't even exist and her not being able to answer. The hole class had laughed. Draco smirked. Yep, he still was the Number One.  
  
And of course he was much better than that git Harry Potter. Speaking of whom, the dark haired boy was also walking in the direction of the Great Hall, accompanied by Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley. Draco scowled. He just hated those Gryffindors. As they entered the Great Hall Draco opened his mouth to make a snide remark but was cut off by a voice from behind.  
  
'Mr. Malfoy!'  
  
Draco turned around to see Professor Barnes walking through the doors towards him. She stopped right in front of him and he put an annoyed expression on his face.  
  
'Yes, Professor?', he said sarcastically.  
  
She gave him a smile and held out her hand. Draco could see that she was holding a tube.  
  
'You forgot this in the classroom. May I ask what it is?'  
  
Draco took the tube and looked at it. Of course . . . He looked back at her and said in a bored voice:  
  
'It's polish for my broomstick.'  
  
The next moment he knew something was wrong. The expression on his Professor's face told him so. A somewhat mischievous grin had suddenly appeared across her usually so kind face and she raised an eyebrow at him. 'You were polishing your "broomstick" during my class?', she said in an amused tone.  
  
She was trying her hardest to hide her grin. For a moment Draco didn't understand what was so funny. But then she spoke again.  
  
'Well, I suppose that's a compliment . . .'  
  
Draco just stared at her. She couldn't possibly mean what he thought she meant. Suddenly he became aware that they were having this conversation in the Great Hall with the whole school listening. He could already hear some whispers. He blushed slightly. He had to correct her, before this became really embarrassing.  
  
'NO! You misunderstood me. I mean, that's polish for my Nimbus 2001!'  
  
With his hands he was showing the length of his broom. Professor Barnes looked at the gesture and had now very much trouble controlling her laughter.  
  
'This long?! Mr. Malfoy, I had no idea!'  
  
Now he could hear suppressed laughter all around the Hall. Potter and his friends were snickering. This wasn't going well at all. He tried again to get himself out of this.  
  
'No, Professor, I had the tube in my pocket! It must have slipped out when I left the classroom! I had been polishing my broom just before class! I can show you!'  
  
As soon as the words were out Draco knew that it was the worst he could have said. The DADA teacher's face had gone red and 'I don't think I want to see it' was all she could say before she couldn't hold back any longer and started giggling madly.  
  
Draco looked around. After the last comment the hole Hall was shaking from laughter. Even some teachers couldn't hide their amusement. Professor Flitwick had fallen off his chair already and was now lying on the floor still laughing. Professor Dumbledore's moustache was twitching like mad and even Snape had trouble appearing emotionless. He was grinning evilly.  
  
Helplessly Draco turned to the Slytherin table. His housemates were laughing as well, except for some students who looked at him with disgust, because they actually believed he had been masturbating during class.  
  
Meanwhile Professor Barnes had regained enough composure to speak, but she still seemed a bit breathless.  
  
'Mr. Malfoy, I think that . . . occupation distracts you too much from your lessons. Maybe we should take you to Madam Pomfrey and see if she can help you somehow!'  
  
And with that she took Draco's arm and dragged him out of the Great Hall ignoring his protests.  
  
'No, Mr. Malfoy! There is no need to be embarrassed! Other people of your age have those problems, too!'  
  
She said it loud enough for the people in the Great Hall to hear it and the laughter followed Draco until he was standing just outside the Hospital Wing.  
  
There he had to endure a very thorough examination by Madam Pomfrey, who told him in the end that it had to be something psychological and that it would be best if they informed his father.  
  
After that Draco was disowned and for several weeks he couldn't go anywhere without having people laughing at him. And the teachers kept on telling him that he should keep his hands visible during the lessons.  
  
It was just some months later that he found out that Professor Barnes had been a Slytherin.  
  
He never spoke up against her again.  
  
Because it is never wise to mess with Slytherins.  
  
And he should know.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
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